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To Philadelphia on April 14, the week before 158 delegates are snatched up by some lucky Democrat. (We're betting it's the chick or the black guy.) Colbert is already in training like some unknown fighter from Philly would be, sucking down raw eggs, punching sides of beef and smoking his morning cigarettes with a side of Scrapple. One piece of advice, Stephen, lay off the cheesesteaks, both literally and figuratively. They take them seriously down there. Oh, one other thing, do like the natives and go with Cheez Whiz.  (by Patrick Sauer) Running Time: 4:50
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