That man has a moustache.

Ironic?

Not really. It's just Guillermo doing another movie parody. About facial hair.

We have no idea what Toddlers & Tiaras is, but it can't be more disturbing than Guillermo all dolled up like JonBenet Ramsey. 

(Shudder)

Here's more if you can take it. 

(Shudders again)

"Oh say, can you see, by the power of the Dodgers..."

(Guillermo wipes away a tear, eats another nacho.)

We feel your pain Guillermo. That was a gut-punch loss if we ever saw one.

Doesn't explain what happened to your shirt,...

Let's get a few things straight:

1.) Guillermo is a great actor

2.) We would love to see Matt Damon play Queen Latifah in a movie

3.) We could take Kimmel in a "Hollywood Rules" fight

4.) Now that they're kaput, is Sarah...

Did you happen to see G.I. Joe: Rise of the Chupa Cobra last weekend? Or were you too busy wolfing down forty tacos?

Yeah, us too. (Burp) Pass the sour cream.

Sad news from the entertainment world, Gidget the Chihuahua, the famous Taco Bell spokesdog, passed awat at the age of 15. Veterinarians were stunned that a dog who subsisted on Taco Bell products could live to the human...

Enough with the now 28-year-old Harry Potter nonsense. 

We'd much rather watch the otherworldly exploits of a rotund "magical Mexican."

He's not still pretending to be in wizard high school. Go on and graduate already. 

All things being equal, right about now, if we were Gov. Sanford...

We'd enjoy the comic release, err, relief.

We would have just called it Up, but then again, we're into the whole brevity thing, man.

This movie doesn't seem realistic. Sure, we buy a curmudgeon floating his domicile away with a buttload of helium...

But a cranky old...

Honda has developed a robot that responds to human thoughts. Many thinks this portends a frightening Stephen King-esque future in which technology will destroy us. Perhaps, but the idea of simply thinking "Hey, robot bring us...

Dígalo ain' T tan, Manny. 

You broke Guillermo's heart.  

For that, you and your girlie jugs should never be honored in the hallowed halls of Cooperstown. 

And get a haircut, 'roid boy. Your "ain't I a stinker?" little boy...