As you can see, there's no "Pee" in it, we'd like to keep it that-- Screw it! You've won 14 medals Michael Fred, fill the pool with your gold-flaked urine! You're the underwater king! You're Aquaman! There should be a Little...

"The following celebrity special should in no way be mistaken for a Barbara Walters special..." Fat chance of that Babs, you never would've dug deep enough to reveal Salma Hayek isn't 100% Mexican! 

We have no idea how much of this interview is true, but considering it's Tracy Morgan, we're going to go ahead and say all of it. The colorful 30 Rock star covers a lot of ground with Kimmel, opening up on such topics as:...

And who is the cruel fat man who said of Hayek, "she's no Penelope Cruz..." Is it Kevin James? No, but he's in the mix. Why it's Senor Salami, himself! (AKA, Jimmy Kimmel.) He would like Senorita Hayek to disrobe, but she...

We do declare that Phelps has won the battle of the bulge. Perhaps Dr. McSwimmy should try hanging his eight gold medals somewhere besides his neck?