What if Mario and Luigi lived next door, listened to awful music and hung out in tanktops and running shorts? What if they invited all their hairy friends over? What if...

For a fairly long period earlier this year, we were without cable, and we learned one important thing: Judge Judy, Judge Joe Brown, Judge Alex, Judge Reinhold...these shows are on constantly. Literally, hours each day. And...

Never, ever say "chemicals" and "explode" on the phone. Ever. Even if you're talking stocks with your mom. For all you know, a couple of lonely NSA wiretappers are on the other line, ready to pounce.

When we consider appropriate ways to teach children proper safety techniques, only one thing comes to mind: German public access television.

In this clip from the Groundlings, a pair of foodies try, and fail, to review an italian restaurant.  With each take, they descend further into madness... echoes of Lord of the Flies.

Children's book publishing is a cutthroat industry.  Sometimes you need to step on some toes, hurt some feelings... and violate some corpses.  Wait, huh?

Who needs privacy? Hell, who needs the constitution? Those NSA wiretappers can be so kewl, OMG LOL!