The Emmys were such a magical night, such a whirlwind of stars, such a heavenly evening of television royalty...our head is still spinning... No, we didn't watch it either. But, as fate would have it, we did the same number...

All of the political and economic uprisings of the last week have our head spinning, but not in a good way. Hold on a moment. (Cough, cough.) Much better. Here's what we need for the weekend, The Terminator and Chong. Woah,...

The famous soft-focus interviews of Barbara Walters weren't hard-hitting enough, so the network brass brought in a ringer, Jimmy Kimmel. In the Big Night of Stars, he sat down with heavyweights in the entertainment industry 

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Even funnier than certain VP candidates who can't stopping dropping F-Bombs...that's why it's bleeped out, right?

Presidential candidates can't be everywhere, so they often send surrogates to spread their message. What better place for dueling puppet-heads-on-a-stick than the Los Angeles county fair, home to corn dogs and frozen bananas ...

You'll never be able to keep food down again!

Don "Cheeto" Cheadle is a man of action. But behind every man of action is a portly Mexican stuntman who can take punishment. Go ahead and slap him around with a carp, attach electrodes to his nipples and show him pictures of...

If you hunger for a vice-president who drinks hot reindeer blood fresh from a severed artery in between killing polar bears with piano wire, have we got the woman for you!

We bet Manny and Guillermo had a big salty time on National Tequila Day, which is apparently a separate holiday from Cinco de Mayo. It's a made-up deal, probably "invented" by Sammy Hagar, but who cares? It's Tequila Day! Now...

Now that Manny Ramirez is settled in at Dodger Stadium (6 HR, 21 RBI in 16 games), we thought it would be a great time to revisit this interview between Guillermo and the braided wonder. (We missed it the first time. Sorry,...

He had to, otherwise the I'm Going to Slap Jimmy Kimmel Across the Face documentary wouldn't work. 

One of these waterbugs saved another man as a teenage lifeguard in a banana hammock and can still hold his breath under water for 99 seconds. The other man is Guillermo. Give the portly Mexican a break, he made it 50 meters...

Unnecessary censorship even works with Presidential hopefuls; it makes Barack sound tougher like one of them guys what still eats "Freedom Fries." 

$4.50 a gallon = $11.6 billion in quarterly profits. Fair to say, in this case, the joke is on us. Thanks, oligarchies!

Tagline of the summer: "Stop doing....bad...stuff."