No one is going to believe that you're a chemical engineer in those rags.  Clean up, son!  Get your uniform on and look the part, for once.

Poor Oxygen. He has such a hard time making friends on the playground.  To make matters worse, once he finally finds a nice Hydrogen honey to hang with, the other girls get their particles in a bunch and screw the whole thing...

If picking up a date at the night club were as easy as chemistry, every guy in their right mind would be imitating volatile chemical compounds.  What if oxygen atoms were really just beautiful women, just willing to flock to...