Nothing says "Christmas spirit" like an unbearably pun-packed CNN report on--this a direct quote--"the dangers of gift cards."  In other news, there is one more HBN after this before Gladstone takes a long, indefinite break,...

On the latest Hate by Numbers, Gladstone sums up the appeal of the new, ridiculous vampire movie Twilight pretty concisely at the 2:25 mark. Honestly, we don't have much to add... other than the idea of looping 70s prog rock...

Stuff like this is why we're watching MSNBC for election coverage in between mailing in tonight's post. Stuff like this and, of course, our future girlfriend, Rachel Maddow. We're meant for each other!

So Wal-Mart and a few other god-fearing conglomerates produced Proud American, some horrible movie that is meant to....um...meant to...teach the world that handicapped and non-white people can...do good things? We're honestly...

Honestly, this is not funny. CNN is trying to figure out who, in addition to Hannah Montana herself, would fit into the proposed "Sex and the City" prequels. Isn't she 15? Weren't dildos a major plot device in that show? How...

CNN took some time to share the story of some crazy lady in Portland who gets naked for the environment. Noble, but yet another example of the network's decline into complete and utter self-parody. Gladstone has more.

Chuck Norris wrote a handbook on returning governmental power to the people. No, that's not a rejected Norris fact from 2005. It's an actual fact from right now, and Norris went on Glenn Beck to share his viewpoint. Gladstone,...

These kids see ghosts, and TV executives see dollar signs. Back in our day, adults called these "imaginary friends." Or, in one unlucky young boy's case, "Gladstone."

Gladstone deconstructs a Fox News segment that looks suspiciously like an informercial for the dumbest fad diet of all time. Regardless, it can't be any more senseless than anything else on that network.

Another tragedy involving a missing child means another outlet for the misplaced rage and extraordinary ego of CNN's Miz Nancy Grace. We'll let Gladstone speak for us.

Gladstone takes a look at the oldest trick in the cable news book--when in doubt, find a zealot who claims to possess a representation of Christ in corn-chip form. Put said zealot on television. Rinse. Repeat.

Funny, we can only find one thing we hate about this video: Miley Cyrus.  Now if you'll excuse us, we need to barricade our apartment door. An army of fifth-graders led by Michael Eisner is on its way to teach us the error of...

Gladstone is back, and thanks to Attack of the Show!, he's figured out that you can demonstrate literally any appallingly dangerous trick as long as you preface it with, "Don't try this at home!"

Back story: some guy who apparently acted on The Sopranos says he has a winning scratch-off lottery ticket.  The great state of New York says otherwise.  Gladstone says we all lose, thanks to par-for-the-course Fox News...

There are a whole bunch of reasons to be annoyed by CNN's coverage of an almost-certain alien hoax.  Gladstone runs them down.  For the record, we love Larry King.  His old-man exhortation to "TALK TO BUSH" made us laugh out...